To express the depth of our gratitude is near impossible because of the sheer magnitude of kindness and generosity shown to our family by those we know but also by so many we have only recently met. The coming together of a community in such a life-changing way has humbled both Kelly and I and touched a very special place in our hearts. As you may or may not know, all our family is in Zim so going through this process without them close by has made it even harder – but as Fred so rightly pointed out at the auction, this Kyalami family has gone above and beyond to make us feel welcome.
To give some background to the traumatic situation which has been eased by the generosity shown by everyone who contributed to the golf day on the 23rd of June I’ll start with Kelly’s cancer diagnosis in 2020. In the latter half of 2020 Kelly was diagnosed with invasive cervical cancer, which resulted in a surgery that at the time was one of the first in Africa to save her fertility. Not to be beaten by cancer especially having lost her mum just 9 months earlier, Kel decided to go public and turned her journey into an opportunity to make as many people aware of the importance of regular pap smears. Today it’s still something she is immensely passionate about and continues to help connect girls and women with the right information and specialists who can help prevent what happened to her.
We were given 2 years to have children, which couldn’t happen naturally so we embarked on an IVF transfer in 2022 – this wasn’t simple given the impact of the cancer on Kelly’s hormones but we got there and on the 1st of August last year we did our first and only transfer which was successful. Everything was going well until the 7th of December when at 21 weeks Kelly’s membranes ruptured as a result of her previous cancer surgery and she was admitted into Sandton Mediclinic for what turned out to be 3 months of strict bedrest. With multiple complications and a hospital superbug which almost resulted in termination, it was a miracle we managed to maintain the pregnancy, but we did until the 21st of February when Kai Chelsey Grace was born via emergency C-section.
She had to be resuscitated on arrival but was stabilised shortly after, we had opted for Kelly to have a hysterectomy to proactively prevent the risk of cancer coming back. This turned out to be the right decision but was incredibly risky for Kelly and instead of 15 mins to complete it took 2 and a half hours.
Our story is incredibly complex and would take far too long to talk through in detail and I’d probably need 10 snakes to get through it, but that first surgery and the introduction of Kai to the world began a series of events that has impacted all 3 of us immensely. Kai’s medical condition was rare because of how it had come about, as a 32-weeker she should have been far more progressed than she was but due to the lack of amniotic fluid she hadn’t developed and was the size of a 26-weeker and had a severe respiratory disorder, in lamens terms she couldn’t breathe on her own – we nearly her more times than I can count, the NICU rollercoaster is intense to say the very least. Kelly went on to have 5 major surgeries due to complications, spent nearly 24hrs under anesthesia and nearly died due to septicemia – we worked out she had been in every ward in Sandton Mediclinic except the psych ward… and honestly, I think I needed to check in there!
In between all this trauma, we got called by our medical insurance to advise that they wouldn’t cover Kai under the main policy which is USD$2.5 million a year in cover but rather only under newborn cover which is capped at USD$100 000 – the equivalent of ZAR1.8 million. We thought this would be more than enough but discovered Kai’s first week in the NICU cost nearly ZAR300K, just over USD$15K, and we were told she’d be in there for a minimum of 12 weeks. For clarity, when Kelly’s mum passed away we moved on to extensive international medical insurance cover (you learn how important this is when you’ve experienced a cancer diagnosis) and infact we have cover much higher than the majority of Discovery plans offered in this country BUT the newborn loophole was going to mean we couldn’t access any of it. Because Kai was premature, she would need far longer than 30 days due to her prematurity but the newborn cover covers the first 30 days after birth and anything that manifests in that first 30 days. We have appealed several times but sadly the insurance will not budge on the cover they are making available. Thankfully everything for Kelly has been fully covered.
I’m pleased to say that our darling girl came out on the day of the golf day after 120 days in the NICU and in total a combined 7-months in the hospital for Kelly and Kai. The combined bill for both is way over R5million with Kai’s hospital bed costing R3million on its own. Whilst this has been incredibly stressful nothing compares to watching your wife and daughter face death head on, so we always kept the faith that we would find a way and the donations made by everyone on the 23rd of June go a very long way to making that possible.
Last but by no means least I would like to make special mention of the organising committee and the Kyalami Country Club teams who went out of their way to create a day to remember. Sam, Monique, Sue, Ash, Tex, Fred and Kyle - thank you for the selfless commitment you all made to ensuring such a beautiful day. Kelly, whilst she couldn't be there in person was so moved by the attention to detail made in the lead up to the event and on the day. The immense kindness shown by each of you taking time out of your busy schedules to arrange a day dedicated to us is something we will never forget.
Thinus and his team, Nicolas and the catering team and Kyle's pro-shop team thank you for the incredible effort put into the seamless logistics and allowing us to use the club's facilities.
I’d like to again express our sincere thanks and gratitude on behalf of my wife Kelly and our daughter Kai, both of whom I’m sure you will meet on the range in the not-to-distant future.
Thank you for giving us a home away from home, we are so very proud to be a part of the KCC family!
Greg Bentley
